All right folks, this was attempted once before my tenure here, to let's-just-go-with "lukewarm response", but I have to assume that it's because most of you don't like Ritch, Ben, or Jack, and not because you don't believe in the principle of the thing. So here you have it- American Hockey Fan's Buy me Beer, Take Two.
I, Jen Adams, your intrepid guide through the birthing process of an American Hockey Fan and all-around decent, thirsty human being, will be attending my first professional hockey game (Devils-Penguins) since becoming an AHF tomorrow night, at Continental Arena in East Rutherford, NJ. I'm a girl who enjoys a tipple or two, and I like my live pro sports like I like my men- mashed, fermented, then poured into a 16-20 oz cup with minimal foam. It's not that AHF readers owe me a beer- I write my weekly post out of the love of the game, natch- but I watched Rob Lowe get his balls shaved for you people. I'm just saying.
The first fan of this blog (or their representative) to bring a cold draft beer to me in section 231, Row 24,seat 10(I'll be the girl loudly screaming generic encouragements at the Devils, such as "Put the puck into the boundaries of the net!" and "Skate faster than the opposing team so that you might score more points!") at any time during the Devils-Penguins game on March 14, 2007 will win the following (optional AND paltry!) prizes, adapted from Ritch's original bounty:
1) At least one (1) picture with me (that will be published on this blog), in which I will use Photoshop's "blur" tool in order to make myself appear freakishly deformed, thereby making you look more attractive in comparison. I can also testify to you being a "totally doable solid 7.5", even if you are, in fact, completely not.
2) At least one (1) paragraph (published on this blog) of effusive, probably somewhat forced praise, saluting you (or your business or project) for your courage, good taste and excellent choice of lagers.
3) Though I'll be rooting for the Devils out of loyalty to/fear of Ben, I'm not all that tied to them, so if you're a Penguins fan, I will happily shift allegiances midgame. If you're a Devils fan, then forget I just wrote that.
Think of the indelible impression you can leave on a nascent hockey fan. If a drop of free alcohol passes these lips thanks to one of you, the sport of hockey will have gained a lifelong fan, and it will all be because of you and the fine people of the Molson Brewing Company. It's in your hands, people.