Tuesday, January 08, 2008

I would like to constructively express my displeasure

With the fucking Buffalo Sabres.
In anticipation of this blog's field trip to The Rock tonight to watch the Devils-Sabres matchup (contingency plan should friendly rivalries betwixt AHFers get too heated: shit on the Bruins), I've felt a fire brimming in my belly. Since Jack has deprived me of any sort of competition in the fantasy standings, taking to the bottom like Jaromir Jagr after a few Bay Breezes and a viewing of Ice Castles, I'm hoping for a little action on the ice; more specifically, him punching me in the face when I tell him that I have placed money on the Devils this evening.
Accustomed to Buffalo-related heartbreak, I'm ever the Buffalo optimist--I drafted Teppo Numinen for my fantasy team, for Chrissakes, and the man's down a heart--and I was willing to push through the adjustment period that was sure to start off the year. Briere and Drury, moved on to greedier pastures? Fuck 'em. Appropriately gendered merch difficult to find? Nothing a copyright-infringing iron-on patch and a wifebeater can't fix. But six games? In a row? A girl's got a breaking point.

First the white man, then Super Bowl XXV, now this.

The early-season performance of Ryan Miller (for whom my yet-to-be-conceived first child, Ryanmiller Adams was to be named), atrocious in itself, grew even crueller with that brief cocktease of a good stretch, and Lindy Ruff was completely right to send him to his room and make him think about what he did in last week's Ottawa game. On the offensive side, though I'm sure he makes up for it with plenty of intangibles, like encouraging words and buying the first round, we might have to be open to the possibility that we overpaid Thomas Vanek, who's picked up a tidy $416,000 per goal thusfar. As for Afinogenov, well, while not in possession of a groin, I have read extensively on the subject, and for $3.5 million a year, I could probably manage to skate it off for the halfway game.

I'm not forsaking my boys for good- the right to bitch is a Buffalo sports fans' birthright, after all- and I'm sure as hell not rooting for the Devils, but let's just say my loyalties lie with Bodog's moneyline tonight.

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