Anyway, my colleague Susie and I got the following email from my boss today around 3:00 PM:
I know it’s last minute, but a friend of a friend is running a gay film series and I promised we’d do something on the blog. Basically, I need someone to go to Clearview Cinema on 23rd at about 8.45pm tonight and interview this guy Hedda Lettuce, then watch the film with him and stay through the movie, which should get out around 11pm. We should also take some pictures. The guy Hedda has a big web following so this will bring in much-needed traffic.
Susie, this is normally something I’d send you to handle, but I know your brother’s in town. So Ritch, can you go? We’ll pay you to work from 8.30 to 11.30 and even buy dinner (no more than about $15, please).
Let’s talk later about appropriate questions.
Thanks. Again, sorry for the last minute timing.
It bears mentioning that Susie's brother is in town because their mother is ill, so my first instinct, sending an email that replied to all saying "sorry Sus, I have a hockey game to watch tonight, so if you could blow off your sick mom and hit the gay film festival for me" really didn't seem like an appropriate course of action.
Stewing, I decided the only way to get around this was to line up someone else as a guest blogger, get them the gig, and then email everybody with my brilliant solution. I immediately thought of Ophira Eisenburg, who is a great comic and storyteller (and Calgary Flames fan), and got her on the phone. I'd already pitched the gig to her, explained about Hedda Lettuce, and got her to tentatively cancel the other gig she had tonight, when my boss ducked into my cubicle, asked if I was trying to get someone to fill the gig, and said he needed to talk to me. He looked a little stern, as though this was not the kind of gig I should be outsourcing, and asked me to come talk to him in his office. I hastily told Ophira I'd call her back, and went into my bosses office.
"So- you're trying to get someone else to do this gig?"
"Um, well, I..."
"Well don't worry about it, because it's a prank.I know it's game seven tonight. We all thought we'd have a little fun- Susie was in on it too."
My boss, and everyone gathered outside his office door burst into laughter. I called Ophira back, explained I was the victim of a cruel hoax, and promptly booked her on my comedy show I host at Comix comedy club every third friday of the month.
She laughed at me too.
At any rate, my path is now clear:
Thursday Night: Watch Bruins/Hurricanes game seven
Friday Morning: Begin plotting my revenge...